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| His family bids adieu to Darrel. |
He looked as if he was sleeping. Dressed impeccably in a matching suit and tie, with gleaming shoes, it seemed as if he was all set to leave. Eliza had been careful to iron out all the creases, because he liked it that way.
Darrel (76) is fondly remembered for being a loving father, a doting husband, a jiver, a raconteur, and a joke-maker. He would keep you in splits. 'If you are in trouble don't call me, ' was one of his favorite exit lines recalled Nigel. I can still see his impish face and twinkling eyes before me. He lifted you up no matter what you were going through. He made it seem so trivial.
We remember the time we made place for him at a church service in Pune and he was generous with his tongue-in-cheek remarks on the proceedings. His sense of humour was his hallmark.
It was at Darrel and Eliza's place in Mumbai that dad and me stayed briefly when I came to get married in 2010. As Eliza rustled up the breakfast I asked where Darrel was. She said he was already up and about and had gone out. Later he said he had gone for Mass to Gloria church, Byculla.
Darrel made it a point to come for dad's passing in Goa in 2017 and marked the occasion in a spirited manner.
When Darrel went today there was praise and thanksgiving led by Lalita (Lallu). After the burial there was good food, music, singing, and spirits, from which we all partook, to celebrate a life well lived. The Mendonca family was there in full strength.
Lallu was one of a band of players from Western Railway who played hockey with Eliza, Darrel's wife. Padmashri Eliza Nelson, a living legend, played for the Indian women's hockey team for the Moscow Olympics in 1980. Small wonder that Darrel was a hockey player too.
It was heartening to see many of the players come over to be with her during the parting. Satinder Walia who was the coach for the camp for the Moscow Olympics was also there. I marvelled at the camaraderie the team still shared. Most of them trooped in from Mumbai.
Darrel's daughters delivered a moving eulogy to their dada. They said he always supported them and taught them to treat everyone equally. Oftentimes he could be heard whistling in the kitchen as he cooked meals for the family.
Andrea braved a 20-hour flight from the U.S. to see him for the last time. Her husband Idris and family could not make it due to cancellation of their flight. Becky was there by her sister's side. Her husband Josh, and his parents Gina and Saleem were were there as well.
Ralph Austin, his cousin, and Brian Gomes, Darrel's friend, came from Cochin. Darrel had taken his family there on a recent trip to rediscover his roots.
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| Rest in peace Darrel. |
Darrel was a poet. For his 75th birthday his daughters compiled all his poems into a book they called Poems from the Heart. Now Becky and Andrea's daughter Sarah have inherited the gift.
There was sunlight and clear skies when Darrel Nelson (1947-2024) was laid to rest today at City Church cemetery, Pune. The solemn Funeral Mass among the graves, which was live-streamed, reminded us where we are all headed. The theme was thanksgiving for the gift of Darrel.
After the body was lowered and the prayers were said, they played 'I Love a Rainy Night' on speakers. It was Darrel's favourite jive number. As Eliza, speaking to Darrel at home said, 'Everyone who loves you is here.'
As the body was being carried out through the doorway Eliza called out for the last time. 'Bye Darrel' she said. Those simple two words summed up a momentous journey.
A hero has gone to rest.
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Pic above by Lyn Mendonca taken in Darrel's home in Pune on Saturday, 13 July 2024. Updated 15/7/24.
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